wordplay
Thursday, June 18, 2009

I've been saving up some cash, and now I have a little over a hundred. In addition to that, I have 30 bucks worth of Kinokuniya vouchers that Joel nicely gave to me, (it was from that poem contest, remember?) and let me keep.

I'm going to spend it all on books, and here are the thing's I'm thinking of getting. Still, anything goes at a bookstore, so it may change.

Viva la Repartee:
Clever Comebacks & Witty Retorts from History's Great Wits & Wordsmiths

Never Let a Fool Kiss You or a Kiss Fool You:
Chiasmus and a World of Chiastic Quotations

Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps

Cosmic, by Frank Cottrell Boyce

Full Spectrum Dominance: Totalitarian Democracy in the New World Order



As for the first two, the same website that I found them at was by a certain Dr. Mardy, who compiles all sorts of wordplay that can be really amusing. below are two of them from the website itself, which can be found here.

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John Barrymore

After a long day of shooting a film in Hollywood, John Barrymore and some fellow actors stopped in at Lucey's, a popular watering hole near Paramount Studios. After one-too-many drinks, Barrymore excused himself to go to the bathroom. In his slightly inebriated condition, however, he inadvertently chose the ladies' room. As he was relieving himself, a woman entered and was shocked to see a man urinating into one of the toilets. "How dare you!" she exclaimed, "This is for ladies!" The actor turned toward the woman, organ in hand, and resonantly said in full actor's voice:

"And so. madam, is this."

Robert Benchley

After lunching at the Algonquin Hotel one day, the American humorist Robert Benchley and his companions walked through the lobby and out the front door. Still engaged in conversation with his friends, Benchley offhandedly said to the uniformed man standing by the front door, "My good man, would you please get me a taxi?" The man immediately took offense and replied indignantly, "I'm not a doorman. I happen to be a rear admiral in the United States Navy." Benchley instantly quipped:

"All right then,
get me a battleship."

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I reckon mark might quip, no book torrenting for you then, eh?

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posted by joseph at 12:17 PM

3 comments