money^4!
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
[I wonder how likely my posts are going to be seen by the tennis mates of mine... Would make enemies if they ever found out :I]
It's about money again. This is getting ridiculous. I'm seeing so often how my tennis mates (possibly not for long [and why is it when I say that I sound like some 'columbine kid'?]) don't find money flow much of a concern.
[oh, again, links in grey.]
Recently, I got an sms from Kenneth asking us to pay up 7.30 for Cheng Jun's birthday present. We celebrated his and Karan's birthday before training one day, with a cake from Bengawan Solo to share amongst us all. Its that type of Chocolate cake that I quite liked, but it being before training, I didn't partake. Anyway, I was wondering why an ordinary Bengawan Solo cake could cost upwards of 70 bucks, because clearly the team of boys makes up 12 in total. Even assuming one or two don't pay, (J1's) its a pretty pricey cake, and with that money, you could buy
better ones at patisser. Later, I found out that, indeed, the sms wording was correct, because there
was a birthday present given to him.
Without my knowledge. It was a bag. And it looked something
like this*. So. I was being made to pay for a gift for a friend that I didn't even know was already given. I had two reservations.
1) Why the heck didn't the guy(s) buying it tell us/me that they were getting that for him?
2) Why didn't they invite us all to give it to him together? Does he even know I'm also contributing?
Now, I don't know how you may interpret this, so I will go along with the assumption that some are thinking me an asshole. Does the person really need to know I contributed? And why complain so much for 7 bucks 50? (I maintain there is no valid argument for not informing me about the present buying though. That one is plain insensitive.)
All these are irrelevant. Simply put, how the heck would I know if two or just one guy from the team, Kenneth, passed it to him? I mean, they didn't have the decency to tell or ask me about buying that gift I now have to foot for, so what makes them so decent a bunch (or just one of them, again,) to say it was a combined effort? And then, why complain so much for 7 bucks 50? Well, 7 bucks is what I get for one day. On average, of this save up 90 cents a day. 7 bucks is thus more than what I save in one week, so it
is a big deal to me. If you buy almost all your items with your own money too, you'd well be having the same mentality as me.
All in, I simply want to
actually know that I'm going to contribute to something, and be allowed to
agree to that something (as in, have my vote and opinion count... Would I think he would like a lolipop instead? Would he like a set of
TYS instead?) Also, it would be appreciated to know that he knows it was a team contribution.
So I told this to my parents just now, since I'm kindly asking them if they could help foot it (though I haven't collected the funds for it) Well, they were quite amused by my reaction. They told me that in the workplace, this sort of crap goes down very often. In fact, too often. My dad recited to me this case of a colleague dying of cancer, and this woman who went around collecting 50 bucks from 20 persons to buy some birds nest for her. Well, apparently that shell of a woman masqueraded it as
just
her generous gift, because the replying thank you card had only mentioned her name. How did my dad know? Because when told about the thank you card, (he donated, obviously) she said, Oh, its on my table, if you want to see it you can come over.
Disgusting.
I'd never ask friends to pool funds for a birthday present or anything else, without getting their approval of the present. I'd never tell them to cough up
after I've gotten it, either. I'd also never not inform them of when or how I was going to give it, not because they helped to foot for it, but because their inclusion of funds obviously means that they have some form of friendship with the birthday person, and as friends, they'd want to be part of it somehow. Some people need to learn basic courtesy, and realise that the case of money from their parents that falls to their laps isn't a universal case.
If you ask me why I rant about it here, and not just tell them off, then its simple; I'm going to see the faces of these people for quite some time yet, and I'd rather not get on the butt side of people who know a lot of people.
*Incidentally, this bag is a bag that nearly all the J2 tennis players have, save another player and I. They got it last year with the jerseys and all. I don't have it. Not only do I not need another bag, that bag is seriously huge as hell. It may look okay in the picture, but the length will drop to your back of the knee, (the width is also just as unwieldy) and for a skinny person like me, I'd look plain ridiculous carrying it. Or it carrying me. I was also pestered to buy it last year, but this case I seriously had to put my foot down. Uniformity of a team can go out the window at this point.
posted by joseph at 9:15 PM